Beyonder Door

“Why do you pursue me to this deserted place?” murmured the Gnome Elder, peering up at me through thick white cataracts. Coupled with his salt-and-pepper beard, deep-set wrinkles and hacking cough, this prune of a face was one that only a mother could love, and probably only if she had cataracts as thick as his. “To benefit from your wisdom, of course,” I said distastefully. “Ha! Even blurred vision is valued by the blind. If I were clever, would I cower in this slag heap? I’m not wise, girl…just old.” “I just wish to get very small, no bigger than a mouse. Do you know how I might do that? And don’t call me ‘girl’” “Only that? Oh yes. I could manage that. For a price.”
I narrowed my eyes at him, stating, “I have nothing of value.” “You have your nerves and your health. Mine are nearly gone. I’ve seen too much suffering. And I smoke too much, you see.” “Point taken. How may I help?” “Deep inside the card guards’ compound, a particularly rough diamond holds the key, under armed guard by a Two and Three of Clubs. Obtain that Key for me, and I will…return the favor. Now, follow me.”
Hobbling over to a lever, he twisted t slightly, and the wall beside him grated upwards to reveal a shimmering, reflective portal-like surface. “Ladies first,” he said politely, motioning for me to walk through, improbable as that sounded. “Ah, the Looking Glass Continuum. Haven’t seen one of those used in a long time, though.” “Speak English, cat,” I hissed. “Step into one Looking Glass, and with luck or lots of practice, you’ll emerge in another Glass nearest to you intended destination. This one, on the other hand, is a bit more special. Step in one Glass and there’s only one other Glass you can step out of. That right, Elder?” “’S the only way we can avoid the Queen’s spying eyes. And if you don’t step through quick, we’ll be spied upon real quick, you mark my words,” he asserted, hurrying all of us into the mirror.
I have to say, I was dazzled by the kaleidoscope of brilliant hues, the light from the mirror refracting and reflecting off the vaguely cylindrical walls at impossible angles to provide an amazing sight, and I was sorry indeed to see the Elder grind shut the Glass. “I’ll betcha the next time you won’t be admiring the view as much as you’re running for your life,” grumbled the Gnome Elder, who promptly vanished at the same time as Chessur. Reminder to self: I really need to pick up that trick. Then again, that’d be denying my knife its first chance at action.
“Hey! Over here!” I shouted, blade in hand, running straight towards the two Club Guards with expressions that spelled i-n-f-u-r-i-a-t-e-d in flashing capitals. Sidestepping the clumsy Three of Clubs, I twirled between the guards, knife extended, opening up long, ugly gashes in their backs and midriff. As the Two of Clubs doubled over in pain, I swung my knife down diagonally, cleaving him open as if I were slicing paper, then turned to behead the Three of clubs as he hefted his axe above his head to strike. It hadn’t taken more than two minutes for me to overcome the so-called “armed” guards. Picking up the glinting key-shaped diamond on the table, I unlocked the door at the back of the room, in time to see and enormous flying mechanism float up from the yawning chasm just outside the door, with the Gnome Elder pedaling and operating its humming propeller.
“You have the key! Most resourceful. It seems that Rabbit’s trust is not misplaced,” the Elder remarked as I hopped on the passenger’s basket. “We will, or rather I will, use the key to lead my fellow kind in an uprising against those abominable Card Guards, and free them from this oppression. They have suffered enough.” “I really feel sorry for your people, indeed I do,” I said in a tone clearly indicating otherwise. “But what about getting me small?” “Within the Fortress of Doors is a Skool, and within it is scattered various items I can mix up in its laboratory to make a concoction to get you small,” he droned. “Items? What items?” “Item, items, you’ll know’em when you see’em. Speaking of seeing, we should keep out of the Card Guard’s—Dammit! We’ve been spotted!” The Elder grunted and began spinning the captain’s wheel.
Curious, I peeked overboard—and was immediately rewarded by a stream of sleek, steel cards whipping wind across my face. Pulling back hurriedly, I yelled, “Are they armed with…machine guns?!” “Automatic Dealer 52s or AD-52s in short. Nay one of those cards they fire can leave a deep cut in your face or my balloon, so you best keep your pretty head in and let me concentrate on steering.” Card guards firing cards…to guard. I’m confused.
Old he might be, but those steering skills were quite top of the notch indeed. Especially when he was maneuvering a bulky balloon against weapons spitting steel fifty-two times a minute. “You’ll have to fight these guards soon enough, but for now…JUMP!” The gnome Elder swiftly drove his crazy contraption near a ledge jutting out of a high wall of the Fortress. “Protective walls may impede you, but the walls most difficult to penetrate are those surrounding out hearts.” “Sometimes, Chessur, I’m not sure if you’re trying to be funny, or just messing with my head. Probably both.” Glaring his way, I braced myself, and leapt.